To Have Loved And To Have Lost
by Becksibee
Summary: It's the battle of Hogwarts, everyone is fighting for there lives. But what happens when you have nothing left to live for? Do you battle on and save the day? or do you died in the hands of death? AE OS R


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters involved. All that belongs to the brilliant J.K. Rowling who I am still hoping will adopt me as and will be my 2nd mother. If you can hear me Mrs Rowling, Adopt me :D

This story came to me while at work, I had wrote it in my head. I thought it would be kind of poetic in a way. Now I wrote with this a popular play turned film scenario can you guess what it is? Box of honey dukes chocolates for the first correct answer. Please bear in mind this is a tragedy and therefore may contain some writing which may affect some people. Enjoy and please review. It helps me know what direction to take my writing in. Thank you.

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To Have Loved And To Have Lost

_Written by Rebecca 'Becksibee' Foster_  
_Edited by Dawn 'Dawnykins' Mitchell_

It was like everything was in slow motion; Harry saw the curse hit Ginny, in her chest. Bellatrix was laughing madly at this. Hermione screamed and dived to the floor holding Ginny's lifeless body, another curse flew across the room and hit a hysterical Hermione, she fell backwards still holding onto Ginny. During that he heard a bloody curdling scream, a scream of pain, he felt somebody push by him shouting 'NOT MY DAUGHTER, YOU BITCH!' Harry was stunned.

'MUUUUUUUMMM NOOOO,' he heard Ron shout running towards his mother. Harry tried to scream, to warn him but it was too late, a curse hit him squarely in the back and he dropped like a fly. Molly began duelling to the death with Bellatrix.

'Ha-ha, that's three of your children down, what will the rest do without mummy?' laughed Bellatrix. 'When she has gone the same way as them.'

'You won't hurt anymore of my children,' said Molly through tears of pain and anger. Bellatrix laughed the same exhilarated laugh her cousin Sirius had given before he toppled backwards into the veil, and suddenly Harry knew what was happening before it happened. Molly's curse soared beneath Bellatrix's outstretched arm and hit her in her chest, over her heart. Bellatrix knew for a moment what happened, her gloating smile froze and her eyes seemed to bulge and then she toppled.

Voldemort screamed, McGonagall, Kingsley and Slughorn all got thrown backwards as he advanced on Molly.

'PROTEGO,' shouted Harry, protecting the whole great hall, protecting the only woman he even thought of as a mum. His heart felt like it was been twisted. He reviled himself to the shock of the whole school. But the mutter of voices soon dropped. He was circling with Voldemort, every movement he took, everything he was saying, felt like it was somebody else controlling him. His insides where burning, they were all twisted, screaming in agony.

'… Permitted me to kill them for you.'

This sent another stabbing pain into Harry's heart. 'You won't kill anyone else tonight,' he said still circling with Voldemort. 'You won't kill anyone ever again. Don't you get it? I was ready to die to stop you hurting these people -'

He didn't know how he was doing it, how, on the outside he was keeping himself together. Yet on the inside he felt like shattered crystal. The words were still escaping his voice, he kept staring into his red eyes, and he knew if he was to look around and see the bodies of his loved ones, he would break on the outside.

'Does the wand in your hand know his last master was disarmed? Because if it does… I am the true master of the elder wand.' A red golden glow filtered through the windows, drowning them both in its glow, Voldemort suddenly a flaming blur. Harry heard the high voice shriek as he, too, yelled his best hope to the heavens, pointed Draco's wand:

'AVADA KEDAVRA!'

'EXPELLIARMUS!'

Harry couldn't tell you what happened now, he cast his last spell. He didn't know if he was going to live or die, and he didn't care. It took a few seconds to realised he was still standing. He looked down upon the ground and saw Voldemort's body, lying lifeless on the ground, nothing but an empty shell of a monster. He fell to the ground, his legs unable to hold him, he was screaming in agony; Molly ran over to him and dropped to the ground, taking him in to a hug while they sobbed into each others shoulders. Nobody cheered, nobody spoke, and they barely breathed. It was a joyous situation, the downfall of evil, yet their hero was in so much pain. Harry got himself together, stood up and walked over to Voldemort's body, giving it a hard kick. He then removed the elder wand from his grip. Neville and Dean quickly ran over and picked up Voldemort's body and took it off into a side chamber, he headed over to Hermione, picked her up and carried her, his heart breaking more with every step he took and placed her next to Fred, Lupin and Tonks while George and Percy carried Ron and Ginny over. Harry placed a kiss on each of there heads, saving Ginny until last.

He softly kissed her on the lips. '_I truly loved you Ginny, I am truly sorry if I hurt you.' _He whispered into her ear, he took something out of his pocket and placed it on her third finger of her left hand. Molly was watching him; she knew how Ginny felt about Harry, Ginny had opened up to her mother during the Christmas holidays. He finished by kissing her head lightly and stood up. He held out his arms around Molly, 'I l-loved her w-wi-ith all my h-heart mum,' he said through sobs Molly squeezed him tighter and then they both pulled apart. 'I loved her for a long time. I hope you don't mind me placing that on there, I was hoping to ask for her hand in marriage when the war was over.' She took him into a hug again, along with Arthur, George and Percy.

'I have something I need to do,' said Harry as everyone let him go. He walked from the great hall and up the stairs, the long walk was strange, nobody was about, no one was occupying their frames on the walls. He eventually reached the Headmasters office, the steps were already there. He climbed up and walked straight through the door, he was welcomed by loud cheering and applause, all the headmasters and headmistress of Hogwarts were cheering for Harry. He walked over to the one behind the desk.

'Its over, he is dead!' Harry told him bitterly.

'Well done Harry,' smiled Dumbledore.

"WELL DONE? I HAVE LOST RON, HERMIONE AND GINNY. If one of them had survived, life would be worth living.' He said sadly.

'Harry you saved the world, you are the masters of the hallows.'

'The stone is lost.'

'Where?'

'Don't know, in the forest somewhere. I stood on it as I went to face my death. I am leaving the cloak in the Weasley possession it could come in useful for them.'

'What do you mean Harry?' Harry chose to ignore this question.

'And third, this…' he held up the elder wand. 'I don't want it.' He took his own Holly and Phoenix wand out of the pouch around his neck and placed it on the desk in front of him, pointed the elder wand at it and said 'Reparo.' The wand kitted back together and red sparks flew out of the end, Harry knew it has worked as he picked up his wand and felt a sudden warmth in his fingers as though wand and hand were rejoicing at their reunion. He then took the elder wand and snapped it in half. He didn't think it would work. He then sat down and wrote a letter out on a piece of parchment.

He made his way though the great hall with his cloak covering him and stopped at the bodies of his friends. He took his cloak off, folded it and placed the letter on top which was addressed; _"To the Weasleys."_ No one stopped him as he turned and left the great hall.

He walked across the grounds, stopping at Hagrid's cabin; he looked across at the lake. 'Perfect,' he said to himself.

In the distance he though he heard a familiar voice shouting Harry, he looked and saw nobody there. He shook his head 'get a grip Harry, there all gone.'

He muttered a spell and a rope appeared, he placed it around his neck, muttered another and was hoisted into the air, he didn't fight it, struggled a bit but never fought it.

'HARRY NOOOOOOO,' he looked down with the last of his strength and smiled at the sight before him. He was in heaven and then he was gone.

'Harry no, Harry please don't be dead.' A red light shot from the end of the casters wand and Harry's body fell with a thud to the ground. Ginny ran over to him grabbing his body, trying to bring him back to life… it was no good. He was gone from this world. 'Harry I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry,' sobbed Ginny refusing to leave him, the crowed that followed a hysterical Ginny out of the great hall was around her.

She was woken suddenly, to the shock of everyone, the curse that hit her wasn't the killing curse, it was a defence curse that knocked her out and gave the signs of death, even a Healer would have a hard time spotting the difference. She felt the ring on her finger and as she sat up she noticed the cloak and note that was rested on her slip to the floor, she picked the note and read it, she stood up and screamed, running to the grounds shouting Harry's name. A puzzled Molly picked up the letter and read:

'_Dear Molly, Arthur, __Bill, Charlie, George and Percy,_

_I am sorry for bringing pain to you all. It is my fault they are all dead, if you hadn't of met me, they would all still be alive. Please forgive me. _

_If either __Ron, Hermione or Ginny had survived I think I could learn to live with the pain, learn to leave each day as the next day of my life. But I can't do that, everyone I have truly loved has died, I can't bring myself to love anyone ever again. _

_I loved Ginny with all my heart, and I am sorry for hurting her a year ago, but I did what I had to do to try and protect her, I am sorry I couldn't do that. She like Ron, Hermione, Fred, Lupin, Tonks and everyone else who died in this war, she died a true hero. _

_I am writing this also to let you know that I have gone to end my life. I will die my own way, by my own rules. By doing this I will be reunited with the ones who have passed, but I also won't bring pain to anyone else anymore. Please tell Neville and Luna that I am sorry and I hope they can find comfort in each other. Tell the surviving that I am no hero; I am just a boy who did the right thing at the time and that a hero wouldn't find the wimps way out. Thank them all for the support they have shown me, thank them all for risking their lives, I just hope you can all live in peace now._

_By the time you will have read this my life will be over, you can find me over looking the lake, nears Hagrid's cabin. It's such a beautiful view. Please bury me near Ron, Hermione and Ginny. It's my final wish._

_I shall for ever love you all. _

_Harry James Potter'_

As her daughter did, she screamed and ran after her. Everyone followed and once they stopped they found a heart broken Ginny clinging to Harry's lifeless body, in hysterical sobs. 'I'm sorry Harry, I'm sorry.' Everyone looked upon the scene helpless, Molly tried to get her daughter away but she refused to leave.

She looked at her Mum with watery eyes, showing so much pain and hurt that if they had not been set in Ginny's face you wouldn't believe they were hers. 'I'm sorry mum," she said as she picked up Harry's fallen wand, placed it against her chest and muttered the spell, she went ridged and fell forwards. The agonising scream that came from Molly could be heard for miles.

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Thank you for reading; I hoped you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you to Edited by Dawn 'Dawnykins' Mitchell for editing it and checking it over for me, I really do appreciate it Dawn.

Please review, it only takes a minute. You can review by pressing the green button underneath here. Check out my other work if you're interested. – After the Battle will be updated VERY shortly. Have my Beta on checking the chapters for me and I have LOADS.


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